an apology, explanation, whinge - call it what you will

this is to get everything clear and out in the open regarding my social life (well, i wouldnt really call it that, but to make it easier on everyone i will refer to it as that). most of you probably havent seen me much in the social scene. i havent really been going out like i used to and havent had a general night at the exeter for AGES. basically my health has been so fragile lately i cant even think about going out and socialising, especially not in a smoky pub. those types of things never really affected me health wise, but the last few months ive really been susceptible to it all. one night in a pub and the next morning ill be coughing chunks for hours.

so im writing this to tell all of you that it has absolutely nothing to do with not wanting to see or spend time with you. or even me just being a slack arse. to tell you the truth, theres nothing more id rather do than go out and drink and have a great time. but the state of my health at the moment is making it near impossible for me to even consider it. i know this is sounding quite dramatic, but i feel i really need to get on top of my health before i subject it to the harshness of night life again. ive experienced too many times going out when im quite unstable, like i am at the moment, only to end up sick as a dog and needing another hospital admission.

this isnt to get you all down and feeling sorry for me or anything like that. truth is, and i cant stress this enough, apart from this niggle in my throat, im feeling the best i have been for months and months. i seriously cant remember the last time i felt this way. but i guess im just being cautious jaan and not wanting to ruin any of the good work by going out and wearing out my body. so if you are having a gig, a gathering or a party, and i either dont rock up or only stay for 10 mins, its only because i need rest my body so it can get healthier, and we all want that dont we?! but if this good health continues, which im really hoping it will, then ill be out there again in no time at all, swigging down paleys and sparkles and sharing good times. until then however, ill have to play it safe and see you all in short doses.

your support and friendship, especially during this last year, has just been amazing. seriously, it means so much to me. and while i may not see you all as often as i should or want to, just remember, you are all in my thoughts and prayers and i love you all dearly (insert sappy music, close down all windows and start up carmageddon).